A Retirement Salvaged – A Story About Paying Attention.

The picture above is of Paul Debrone, retired Air Canada pilot, in the early days of his retirement. Paul still holds the world record for the longest-tenured pilot in aviation history – 46 years of continuous service with Air Canada, which included being the #1 pilot in seniority for eight straight years.

It’s also the picture that spawned an awareness that his coveted retirement was not serving him well.

I introduced you to Paul in a post (click here for the article) almost a year ago. Paul and I had met by phone about a year before posting the article. I was impressed with the life adjustments he was making as he transitioned into retired life and his awareness that he needed to do something about his physical condition.

Motivated heavily by the picture above, he had changed his diet, started an exercise regimen, lost 30 pounds, and committed to, and completed, a sprint triathlon. His wife, Cheryl, recorded the event in this nicely done YouTube video.

Then this email hit my inbox:

Good evening Gary,

Last April I did a sprint triathlon and started training for an Iron Man 70.3. I am retired and 67 years old and I thought in excellent shape with a change to a whole plant-based diet. In my excitement for my newfound energy, I decided to get my FAA pilot (license renewed). Well. I failed my EKG. Fast forward, testing etc. I am at this time sitting in my room at the Cleveland Clinic in Weston Florida, just had quadruple open heart bypass performed on Thursday. There is too much to share on an email – feel free if you’re still up give me a call till 2 AM another 55 minutes from now on my cell phone and I can discuss these matters.

Fly safe

Paul

From sprint triathlon and training for an Iron Man 70.3 to this:

And from that to this – in 10 months:

No podium honors, but he finished the swim-bike-run in his first attempt at an Ironman 70.3 – at age 68 and less than a year after a quadruple bypass.

But, there’s a bigger story here!

It would be easy to stop here and have a good story. But, as significant as it is, the 70.3 Iron Man success is just a product of a bigger story – one kickstarted with the boat picture.

Paul’s deteriorating physical condition paired up with a post-retirement depression rooted in going from the highest-ranked, most-recognized, and most-followed pilot at Air Canada to “who am I now?”

This double-whammy moved him to take action on more than just the physical front that led to this amazing sequence of achievements.

Other things moved in Paul that are even more significant.

For years, Paul had been an active contributor to Air Canada’s Employer Assistance Program, providing guidance and counseling to pilots who were struggling with issues such as depression, anxiety, addictions, communication challenges, and interpersonal relationships. Air Canada found that $1 invested in this program had a $7 payback in terms of retaining talented pilots.

Following retirement, Paul continued his commitment to working with Air Canada pilots under that program.

The 70.3 deepened and added a new dimension to this commitment.

Enter post-race depression.

Unexpectedly, Paul experienced significant post-race depression.

It felt very much like his post-retirement depression.

He learned from fellow racers that it happens to nearly every triathlete/marathoner upon completion of a goal that required such a deep and extensive mental and physical build-up.

He also learned that the most effective antidote was to set another challenging goal – and do it quickly.

He and Cheryl booked another 70.3 in Luxemburg – a race that touches three countries and takes place in June 2023. They start the serious training in January.

A salvaged retirement-

Paul realizes now that his post-retirement depression was because it was a “retirement from” and not a “retirement to.”

Goalless, drifting, vocation-to-vacation, labor-to-leisure retirement.

They had bought into the traditional off-the-cliff model.

Their observation of the deterioration of fellow retirees and a photograph in a boat turned their ship in a different direction.

– and a new mission

Based on his experience, Paul has a concern and a heart for the other retirees in his community, where he observes the same type of mental and physical deterioration he had experienced. He’s also learned that his best chance of affecting change in that community is through example and not confrontation. Hence, he and Cheryl remain highly visible in the community with their commitments to physical conditioning and other healthful lifestyle choices.

Paul is deepening his commitment to the Air Canada EAP program by reaching out to pilots entering retirement with his message of the importance of retiring to something, protecting their health, and seeking a purpose within their retired life.

Pilots are trained to pay attention to the important. For that, we can all be thankful.

Paul used that training and instinct to turn his own life around and commit to making a difference in others.

Paying attention today is a challenge. Much of what we pay attention to isn’t important. The easy, comfortable, convenient, and urgent crowd out the important.

If we’re fortunate, we’ll all have a boat picture in our future to help us pay attention.

 

What’s It Really Like Being 80 Years Old? Surprise, surprise! Nothing changed.

 

Image by annca from Pixabay

Irrelevance comes easy.

Respecting the biology.

How Old Would You Be If You Didn’t Know How Old You Are?

How Come Some Older People Don’t Want To Live That Long?

This is one of those basic existential questions that we all wrestle with at some point in our lives.
Do I want to live long?

It’s easy to understand why one would want life to be over if they are in constant pain, lonely/isolated, and are merely drawing breath, using up oxygen, and taking up space. It has to be a terrible feeling to want your body to give out when it continues to hang in.

I watched helplessly as both my dad and uncle experienced a grueling and extended period of morbidity with smoking-induced emphysema before their bodies finally, and mercifully, gave up.

It was a lonely, fearful existence.

What I do find interesting, however, is why people who are in good health say they don’t want to live that long.

In my mid-sixties, I began to profess that I intended to live to 100 (I’ve since revised that to 112 1/2). Everyone I shared that with was repulsed by the thought and said I was nuts.

That largely remains the case, with some softening, perhaps because of some increased awareness of the possibility – or just simply out of pity.

Despite so much evidence today of people living into their 90s and beyond with high levels of vitality, activity, and positive contribution to society, we still remain fearful of later life.

Two fears.

Research has shown that the two greatest fears as we age are:

  1. Outliving our money
  2. Losing our independence i.e. becoming frail

Simply put, we don’t want to happen to us what we have seen happen to others as they have aged poorly. Plus, we cling to and suffer under strong negative cultural beliefs about aging.

The extensive research that has been done on the lives of centenarians and super-centenarians reveals a different attitude toward aging and the trials that accompany it.

Click this link to an article by neuropsychologist and author Dr. Mario Martinez entitled “How To Live to 100 and Beyond: The 4 Core Traits That All of the World’s Longest Lived People Have in Common”.

Dr. Martinez studied the habits and mindsets of the world’s longest-living people globally. Embedded in his research are clues to what we can all do to live a longer life by simply changing our attitudes, mindsets, and cultural beliefs.

I hadn’t discovered Dr. Martinez when I began professing my goal of living to 100. I had, however, been influenced by the work of semi-retired Stanford geriatric physician, Dr. Walter Bortz, when I read his book “Dare To Be 100”.

His message is simply that there is no biological reason, aside from the very infrequent “blueprint errors” or genetic defects, for any of us not to live to 100 or beyond. He also points to the importance of mindset and habits.

He uses the acronym DARE to represent four keys to reaching 100:

  • D – diet
  • A – attitude
  • R – rejuvenation/renewal
  • E – exercise

Of the four, he emphasizes that “A-attitude” is the most important and the most difficult.

That is consistent with what Dr. Martinez found as he studied centenarians. Their trip to 100 has, at its foundation, a “defiance of disempowering cultural beliefs” that lay so much negative on us about the rigors and struggles of aging.

Dr. Martinez says this about the centenarian mindset:

“Resilience, perseverance, creativity, and flexibility are all attributes I have found in every healthy centenarian I have studied, in cultures spanning five continents.”

So I think it’s safe to say that the antidote to “not wanting to live that long” starts between the temples with an attitude shift and a mindset change that moves us, in Dr. Martinez’s words,

“-from one of passing time to one of engaging space. We need to snap out of our hypnotic concept of time in which things happen to us in sequence, and instead be mindful of how we can happen in our space without assigning a sequence”.

Yes, I expect to continue to be called “nutty or a fool” for my goal of living to 112.5. But I now realize that this reaction is just as described – it’s rooted in a deeply entrenched cultural belief that aging, early senescence, pain, and loneliness are all inextricably linked.

Will I get to 112.5? Chances are pretty slim because the first 50 of my 80 years included some marginal lifestyle habits (smoking, standard American diet, limited exercise) that will reduce my chances. But it’s certain I won’t get there – or even come close – if I don’t set the goal and adopt the mindset of a centenarian.

What if –

– you combine a centenarian mindset with a reason to get up in the morning i.e. a sense of purpose? Do you think your perspective on getting old might change?

Works for me!

Try it, if you haven’t.

Does your mindset line up with that of a centenarian? Have cultural beliefs influenced your attitude toward aging? Does the thought of hitting the century mark resonate or repulse? I’d love to hear your thoughts on the topic. Leave a comment below or drop me an email to gary@makeagingwork.com

Open Letter to Someone Who Needs to Be Rich to Avoid Suffering.

Image by Siggy Nowak from Pixabay

Someone, somewhere, popped this question recently on Quora.com. I had to respond.

How can I be rich? Am I suffering too much?

May I ask – are you talking intrinsic riches or extrinsic riches?

The difference?

Extrinsic = external, materialistic, possession-based riches such as money, houses, cars, clothes, etc.

Intrinsic = internal riches are unbound to possessions and include self-image, self-satisfaction, feeling valued and needed, knowing and using your core talents and strengths selflessly.

Extrinsic riches fade.

Intrinsic riches endure.

If you are suffering, perhaps how you feel about yourself is too bound to the cultural influence and imagery that surrounds and pushes us onto a hedonic treadmill to try to keep up, to cast an image of outward success, to compare favorably.

That’s a trail full of potholes that typically ends in more suffering.

Teddy Roosevelt said it best:

“Comparison is the thief of joy.”

We were not put on this planet to accumulate. We were put here to serve. Our capitalistic society is built on continuous accumulation, and our culture pushes comfort, convenience, and comparison. It’s a perfect storm, and the end game can be unnecessary suffering.

You’ll find true riches in:

  • Relationships
  • Understanding and being true to yourself
  • Swimming against the destructive culture of accumulation and extrinsic pleasures
  • Taking your innate talents and strengths and using them to help make the world a better place.
  • Avoiding time travel into the past and the future, seizing each day, and staying in the moment.
  • Doing something that will succeed you.

There will always be suffering in our lives. It’s part of what moves us forward.

You’ll find your riches in the gifts within you.

Use them to drive positive change based on intrinsic values.

Can One Live to 80 Without Any Ailments? It’ll Take More Than Luck and Genetics.

Turning 80 is apparently a pretty big deal. I just did it and found that it drew a lot more attention than when I turned 70 – or any other age I recall.

Except, perhaps, 21. For stupid adolescent reasons, I don’t remember much about that one.  I was somewhere in Cheyenne, Wyoming with a group of fellow reprobates as I recall. Beyond that – well, that’s enough detail.

Turning 80 drew all the expected unhumorous funny cards, and the usual ageist remarks all delivered with a mix of love and pity.

I was told that finding a funny card – or any card, for that matter – for an 80-year-old is a lot tougher than finding one for 60- and 70-year olds. Makes sense since, the average amongst we U.S. males are unavailable to be recipients, having moved on at around 76.

How are you ailment free, they ask?

I can claim, unabashedly, that I’m fortunate to not look my age. I say unabashedly because it’s not an accident and it ain’t genetics. I work at it and have been for 40+ years.

Some are inclined to ask how I can get this far without major ailments.

If they only knew.

Behind what they see is an above average collections of maladies.

I tell folks that they’ll not likely get this far without a few. It’s really more of being able to live with them. Resilience is one of the characteristics found in those who live longer lives.

I’ve been trying to increase my resilience as the years have moved on.

Some “ailments” I’ve had for years. Both knees ache from 20 years of pickup basketball and two “clean up” surgeries; I just had an arthritic thumb joint removed that has hindered my love of golf and playing guitar for the last couple of years; at age 73, a CT scan revealed I have significant artery calcification which translates to cardiovascular disease; I have an under-active thyroid that I’ve medicated for 30+ years that makes weight control difficult and causes fatigue; I have atrial flutter (which is a first-cousin to atrial fib) for which I take a blood thinner. And my feet hurt about 24 1/2 hours a day.

Having said all that, I stay firm in my conviction that I can live well beyond the average lifespan for men, which has been steadily declining over the last several years in America.  I don’t have symptoms of anything that would say that an early check out is imminent.

I admit to a modicum of fear of COVID and I’m remaining reasonably vigilant to avoid infection.

Here’s the point.

So much of how long we live and how we live long is between the temples. Few of us will avoid ailments because chances are, if we are an American, our lifestyle preceding our later years was – shall I say – less than stellar. We most likely ate badly because we were beholden, out of naivete, to the deplorable Standard American Diet (SAD).

And, most of us exercised far too little.

It’s really pretty simple. As a culture, we don’t really know jack about how our bodies and minds work and how to treat them optimally. And then we whine when we hit 60+ and some of our parts are acting like they are ready to be sent back to the universe.

I love the golf analogy. Nearly all of us have played a pretty crappy “front nine” with our lifestyles of comfort, convenience, and conformity and find ourselves either remorsing through a dismal back-nine or trying to make up for or reverse it on those final nine holes.

I’m the poster child for that. I smoked until age 37 and ate badly through my first 60 years. Although I have been a gym rat and avid exerciser for over 40 years, the CT scan at age 73 revealed the truth of how those first five decades+ had slowly, insidiously taken their toll.

So, resilience is part of the backbone of my existence as I march on this “pollyannish mission” to 100+. I work out aggressively – both aerobic and weight lifting – six days a week. It’s painful at every session, but I’ve learned to tolerate the pain in favor of the results. I’ve also moved my diet to a better balance of WFPB (whole-food-plant-based) and healthy fats and away from the Standard American Diet (SAD) C-R-A-P (calorie-rich-and-processed) diet that we Americans are captive to.

I choose to do the things that I know will maximize my chance of hitting my goal while having no illusions that I could be out of here by the end of the day. I’ve learned that all I have is today and have, with difficulty, learned the value of avoiding time travel into the future or the past.

It’s really all about ATTITUDE and RESILIENCE as we age. Do some research on the lives of centenarians, and you will find that nearly all of them have two consistent characteristics:

  1. They have endured and survived numerous health and mental challenges in their lifetimes.
  2. They have kept a sense of purpose and meaning in their lives, with the majority of them avoiding leisure-based retirement and staying engaged in some form of work.

If 80 is your goal (I suggest raising the bar – the human body can last to 112 years, 164 days), be prepared for ailments but adopt a “second half” lifestyle that will help you keep those to a minimum and give you more physical and mental strength to live with them.

How are you dealing with your “ailments?” Or maybe you don’t have any! We’d love to hear what works for you. Leave us a comment below or email us at gary@makeagingwork.com.

How I Know That I Will Live to 112 1/2. No – It’s Not the Broccoli!

Image by 185128 from Pixabay

Such good news.

Isn’t it incredible? So much helpful news proliferating online with newly discovered answers to long-standing mysteries about our bodies and our health?

Like the significance of standing on one foot.

Seriously, who woulda thunk it?

Your ability to stand on one foot may be a predictor of how long you will live.

Whaaa?

In my incessant wandering, I stumbled into an article on Yahoo!News that has renewed my confidence in getting to 112 1/2. (For you new readers, that’s an insane goal I set at age 75 because I wanted to have 1/3 of my life left to do some catching up. I’ll let you do the math.)

Can you stand on one foot? A study suggests this simple task may predict how long you’ll live.

It appears that a group of under-employed Brazilian medical researchers has penetrated a new frontier by discovering that, and I quote: “Unlike aerobic fitness, flexibility and muscle strength, balance tends to be preserved until the sixth decade of life, after which it wanes precipitously,”

Excuse me? Haven’t we known that for, like, decades maybe? When you are busy burning down rainforests, I guess news like this is late to get to Rio.

So what does this have to do with my admitted insane goal of living to 112 1/2?

I’m going to do some serious (fantasy?) extrapolating here. Track with me for a second.

Testing the edges of medical science!

The researchers tested over 1,700 folks with an average age of 61 (range 51-75) of varying weights, BMI, height, and who could all walk steadily. They asked them to stand on one foot for 10 seconds.

One in five failed the test.

10 seconds!!!!!!!

The researchers went on to note that: (bolding emphasis is mine)

“- the inability to pass the test rose with age (Duh!). In general, people who failed the test tended to be in poorer health than those who passed, with a higher proportion being obese, having cardiovascular disease and unhealthy blood cholesterol levels. Type 2 diabetes was three times more common among people who failed the test as those who passed. (Hmmm. Imagine that!)

After accounting for factors such as age, sex, BMI, history of heart disease, hypertension, diabetes and high cholesterol, the researchers found that the risk of death within 10 years was 1.84-fold higher in participants who failed the balance test.”

Perhaps that explains why we rarely see anyone standing on one foot at Carl’s Junior or Pizza Hut.

112 1/2 is within reach –

-based on this newest “science.”

Here’s the way I figure this scientific revelation plays out for me.

When I visit Lifetime Fitness on Monday, Wednesday, and Saturday, one of the 16-20 exercise routines I do is to stand on one foot.

For several years, I just did it for 60 seconds. But some months ago, I decided to stretch it a bit.

Right now, I’m up to 2 1/2 minutes with no problems, other than ankles that start barking a bit and some curious looks from fellow exercisers.

Based on this earth-shaking Brazilian research, if I’m 61 and can’t stand on one foot for 10 seconds, I have a 2x greater chance of dying in 10 years than if I could. So, since I’m 15X the minimum and I’m 80 (both true), then 112 1/2 is a no-brainer, right?

OK, don’t test me on the math.

Or the theory.

Yeah, I click-baited you a bit with all this.

I have no illusions about the fact that 112 1/2 is a pipe dream – it’s just out there as a stretch goal and as a reminder that 8-10 hours a day in a 90-degree position moving fingers only isn’t good.

Obviously, being able to stand on one foot for, let’s say, 30 or 60 seconds isn’t going to solve obesity or Type 2 diabetes. That’s cart before the horse. I have neither condition, but that’s because of things I do beyond standing on one foot. Assuredly, the fact that I can do it for 150 seconds is a manifestation of a much broader list of physical activities I undertake weekly.

My home office is replete with an adjustable kettlebell, exercise bands, and ample room for planks, stretching, and balance exercises. I use a $6.95 kitchen timer set to 55 minutes to alert me to get off my arse for 5-10 minutes every hour to walk outside or do one or more of the aforementioned. I’m successful with that routine about 50-75% of the time.

James Clear reminds us in his book “Atomic Habits”:

“Goals are good for setting direction, but systems are best for making progress. Environment is the invisible hand that shapes human behavior.”

Goals? Check

Systems? Check

Environment? Check

Discipline? Oops!

I know I can get better – we all can. Maybe even get up to 200 seconds but that won’t accomplish anything other than ego-stroke and bragging rights. The getting better part is to have the commitment to a process and the discipline to stick with it.

The test failure is simply a glaring exposure of the poor state of health amongst aging citizenry, be they Brazilian or American. I suspect a comparable group of Americans would do no better – probably worse.

Try it.

If you can walk steadily and fail this test, time to start a process. Any process to start, so long as it gets you moving, building some muscle mass (especially leg strength), and improving your balance.

You’ll be grateful those Brazilian researchers didn’t have enough things to fill their days.

 

 

 

Does life really get harder as you get older? It gets down to choices. Here are four simple ones.

It’s a question we’ll face at some point on our journey.

It’s really about the choices we make as we age. Life can be harder or easier based on those choices

I recently experienced the 20th anniversary of my 60 birthday. Hard to believe that I’ve gotten this far.

I haven’t had a dramatic life but have had my share of ups and downs. I’m fortunate that I started making better decisions about my self-care before getting to mid-life and believe that has helped me carry good health deep into my third age.

With good health and learning from my ups and downs, I have found life easier as I’ve aged. Not because I have achieved anything out of the ordinary financially but because I’m more aligned with the talents I was gifted with and the skills I’ve acquired.

While it may be a bit harder to get around physically, it’s easier to get around mentally.

For most of us, age brings a modicum of wisdom, and part of that is learning to not waste time, energy, or mental bandwidth on things that are out of our control which, as it turns out, are most of the things that we are tempted to worry about.

With age comes the awareness that there are big holes in the cultural guidelines that we were expected to adhere to as we matured. If we are lucky, as we age we begin to re-evaluate the need to conform and to compare ourselves to others or to materialistic standards.

Unfortunately, life doesn’t get easier for many as they age. Many are trapped in bodies with blue-print errors (rare) or that have been abused through poor health habits in the earlier decades. The average American experiences 12+ years of debilitating chronic illness in their final years, more than any other developed country on the planet.

If one enters mid-life (the 40s or 50s) in poor physical condition, the stage may be set for an unpleasant and challenging second half or third age.

Another key component that makes aging more tolerable is having an active and vibrant social network, especially one that is not made up of only same-aged people. Social isolation is a major contributor to poor health and a shortened lifespan and can become a challenge as we age and friends and family pass on.

Four essential choices.

Making aging easier thus gets down to this:

  • Take charge and protect your health.
  • Keep making friends and stay close to family.
  • Never stop learning and have a purpose, something that you want to accomplish that challenges you both physically and mentally.
  • Don’t give in to the cultural pressure to retire. Full-stop retirement has been shown to undermine the above and ultimately make life harder.

Can you add to the list? Let us know your thoughts with a comment below.

Want To Max Out Your Longevity and Do It In Good Health? Good Luck – You’re On Your Own!

 

Image by Gerd Altmann from Pixabay

Let me whip this dead horse again.

Our healthcare system isn’t.

It’s a disease-care system. And there’s little chance it will ever do much more than dispense medical advice and fix the downstream problems without bothering to look upstream.

Or, as I’ve said before, it’s a system well trained in mopping up the water but untrained, and uninterested, in turning off the spigot.

If you learn how to turn off the spigot, then you don’t show up ’cause you don’t need fixing. The whole system falters and takes the pharmaceutical industry with it.

I hear what you’re thinking – TV without drug commercials? If only!!

But, I’m 55 and I want to make it to 100!!

Doable.

But, you’re on your own!

The knowledge is out there for those of advancing numbers to live better and longer. Just don’t go looking for it in our hallowed health/disease-care system.

Let me show you how bad it is.

I’m turning again to Dr. Ken Dychtwald of the Age Wave organization for help. Here’s what he revealed about our so-called medical excellence in the U.S.A. in a presentation last month. (See the full presentation here). 

  • 126 medical schools in the U.S. – only 16 with full departments of geriatric medicine. 
  • 85% of graduating physicians will have graduated without taking one course in geriatric medicine.
  • In the U.S. – 55,509 pediatricians; 4,278 geriatricians.
  • Lowest paid physicians: geriatricians. Highest paid: cosmetic surgery.
  • Medicare: not user-friendly, incomprehensible.
  • Federal spending per person per day:
    • Defense: $5.75
    • Medicare: $5.27
    • Medical research: $0.29

Another qualified source, Dr. Robert Lustig, a retired pediatric endocrinologist and author of “Metabolical” points out that the average physician receives 7.9 hours of nutrition training across four years of medical school. 

Has your primary care physician ever informed you that the number one cause of early death in the U.S. is – wait for it – DIET!! He/she knows it – but is not paid to tell it.

So, let’s call it what it is – a serious disconnect – and move on.

Move on to what?

To being the CEO of your health.

Sound daunting? Time-consuming? Not so much, relative to the value.

The idea of 35 trillion cells somehow working together to keep each of us vertical sounds pretty complex – and it is. Beyond comprehension actually.

But the care and feeding of that miracle aren’t all that complicated so being the CEO of your 24 x 7 x 365 immune system doesn’t require heroics.

But it does demand a mission, a discipline, and a process.

But, wait, isn’t that behind any success?

A Starter Kit

Here’s a starter kit to get you on your road to CEO.

Reading (in this order): (NOTE: these are paid links. If you buy the book through the link, I earn a small commission – about enough for half a cup of Starbucks lousy coffee).

On-Line

  • The Longevity Advantage (interviews with, and articles leading names in research on longevity – developed and managed by my friend Scott Fulton)
  • AgeWave – Dr. Ken Dychtwalds’s site offers research, articles, and videos on aging and health and wellness.

I’m reminded of a statement by neuropsychologist Dr. Mario Martinez. In his book “The Mindbody Self: How Longevity is Culturally Learned and the Causes of Health Are Inherited” makes an important point when he says:

“We inherit millennia of wisdom on how to achieve optimal health. Rather than mechanical products of our genes, we are the coauthors of their expression. With few exceptions, illnesses are only genetic propensities, not inevitable disruptions waiting their time to unfold.”

In other words, we start life with a birthright of good health with those 35 trillion cells somehow kludged together into this amazing 24×7 immune system that works its butt off to keep us healthy. That’s our inheritance.

Through our culturally-influenced lifestyles, we choose to screw that up. Through our ignorance and inaction, we actually teach ourselves how to be sick.

Except, that is, for those who have donned the CEO hat.

Let your thoughts be known with a comment below. We value your input.

More people now want to live to 100 or beyond. What’s up with that? Three thoughts from a future centenarian.

Nausea was a common reaction.

Derisive laughter and/or a cocked eyebrow were givens every time.

That’s what happened when I began to trumpet 5+ years ago, as I approached 75, that I was planning to live to 112 1/2.

Even my explanation for the unusual number didn’t allay the negative reactions to the prospect of living that long.

I set the target at 112 1/2 because I felt I would need another third of my life to get some things done that didn’t happen in the first two-thirds, which, by the way, were substantial.

Nearly everybody I shared my nutty goal with was repulsed by the idea.

I found it to be an effective tool to drive a stake into a lagging dinner conversation with my age cohort – conversations that more times than not evolve into “organ recitals” enumerating myriad aches, pains, surgeries, pending surgeries, and who is the latest to have developed Alzheimer’s.

My announcement wasn’t, and isn’t, an attempt at any form of sensationalism or “hey, look at me.” I set the target with the acquired awareness that there is no biological reason that anyone shouldn’t live to 100 or beyond.

Why not me?

After all, Madame Jean Calment of Arles, France set the benchmark for us and reinforced the possibility by living to 122 years and 164 days. Just because we can’t seem to get past 65% of that full-life potential, on average, doesn’t mean 100 or beyond isn’t a reasonable goal.

I wasn’t surprised then when a 2009 Pew Research Study revealed that only 8% of Americans expressed a desire to live to 100. A decade later, Dr. Ken Dychtwald reported in his book “What Retirees Want: A Holistic View of Life’s Third Age”  that only 22% of Americans say yes to the idea, with the number dropping to only 17% for those over 65.

But what did surprise me was when a short time later, another Dychtwald report – which  I referenced last week – points out something different entirely.

That report determined that, on average, 61% of retirees said they want to live to 100.

Why the reversal?

Is this faulty research and reporting or have attitudes toward aging shifted suddenly.

Let’s cut some slack for Pew Research and Dychtwald’s AgeWave organization. They’ve been doing extensive research in this field for decades.

So, what’s behind a shift in attitude away from nausea to welcoming.

I welcome your thoughts on what may be behind this. As you collect them, let me offer up three that come to my mind:

  1. The pandemic and its aftermath have turned on some lights. A sudden face-to-face encounter with the fragility and uncertainty of our mortality has cast a different light on the fleeting nature of time and the importance of finding a higher purpose and deepening relationships as we age. Maybe the helter-skelter scrambling lifestyle hell-bent on accumulation and built on shallow relationships and stressful, health-sapping work stress isn’t resonating so well. Maybe we are seeing some abandonment of all that in favor of wanting to make more out of what remains.
  2. The Betty White syndrome. Poor Betty tripped and fell right at the finish line, but weren’t we all rooting for her to make it? She and the growing number of healthy centenarians being publicized have begun to change attitudes toward hitting 100, demonstrating that getting to 100 doesn’t have to be about dementia, drool, and Depends or wheelchairs and walkers.
  3. Wisdom is taking hold. Perhaps we’re beginning to subscribe to the notion that it’s never too late to start and always too early to quit. Even though we may have screwed up our front nine with marginal lifestyle habits, we’re committing to a back nine/second half built on healthy, life-extending habits with the awareness that the body has amazing recuperative powers and is inclined to pay back in kind when provided with what it needs to function optimally.

A caution.

Don’t forsake today.

Even though I put 112 1/2 out in front of me, I’m increasingly aware of the essential nature of carpe diem and the dangers of living outside of today, be it in the past or the future.

Today is all we have.

Share your thoughts on this, please. Leave a comment below or email me at gary@makeagingwork.com. If you haven’t, join our email list and receive articles like this each week at www.makeagingwork.com. There’s an archive of over 200 articles there for your browsing pleasure.

“Suicide By Lifestyle.” Can We Get Any Better At This Art Form in America? Yes- Here Are Five Suggestions.

Image: Flotsam/Shutterstock.com

Suicide by lifestyle.

Now there’s a term that seems appropriate for today’s America considering our lifespan is receding and our healthspan tends to be pretty stinky relative to its potential.

I couldn’t ignore the phrase when I came across it in a new book I’ve just started – “The Body: A Guide for Occupants” by Bill Bryson. (Paid link).

I wish I had coined it. But, alas I’m left with having to steal it.

You’ve probably heard of  Bryson. He’s been around a while and is renowned for the extent of the research behind his writing and his incredibly creative style and ability to make huge complex topics easy and fun to read.

 

It takes a while –

If you’ve been following my diatribes for a while, you will understand why the phrase got my attention. Here’s how Bryson used it:

“And how do we celebrate the glory of our existence? Well, for most of us by eating maximally and exercising minimally. Think of all the junk you throw down your throat and how much of your life is spent sprawled in a near-vegetable state in front of a glowing screen. Yet in some kind and miraculous way our bodies look after us, extract nutrients from the miscellaneous foodstuffs we push into our faces, and somehow hold us together, generally at a pretty high level, for decades. Suicide by lifestyle takes ages. Even when you do nearly everything wrong, your body maintains and preserves you.”

If he’s anything, Bryson is a realist.  He reminds us that 5 of 6 cigarette smokers won’t get lung cancer. Most prime heart attack candidates don’t have heart attacks. Every day, between one and five of our cells go rogue and become cancerous only to be captured and killed by our immune system. He states: “Cancer may be a common cause of death but it is not a common event in life.”

-but we’re getting better at shortening it!

Hey, we’re Americans and not inclined to settle for the status quo. So we are getting better and better each year at accelerating the suicide.

But, we could do even better.

Here are five simple tricks to supercharge this strange mission:

  1. Make sure that each meal comes encased in cardboard, plastic, or styrofoam, comes through the side window of your car, and has no fewer than five unpronounceable ingredients.
  2. Subscribe to Netflix, Disney+, Amazon Prime Video, Apple TV, Peacock, YouTube TV, Hulu, HBO Max, ESPN Plus, Starz, and do each one proud with your viewing time. (P.S. If you are over 65 and retired, the bar you need to clear is already set high – 49 hours a week on average. Be patient – it will take some effort but you can get there! A voice-activated remote is essential for this to happen.)
  3. Cancel your library card, give away any unread books, swim in the Fox News/CNN/MSNBC (cess)pool, and go all-in on #2.  Oh, sorry, did I forget to mention adding Facebook to this mix? Good to start your day there.
  4. Avoid athletic clubs, never take stairs, and continue to drive the 2 blocks to the mail kiosk. Sell the rusting upright bike/treadmill/Total Gym/weight bench in the basement and reinvest in (a) wider-screen TV; (b) yard maintenance service; (c) any of those in #2 that you’ve overlooked.
  5. Go underground. Avoid any heavy human interaction. Keep your circle of acquaintances small and closely aligned with your ideology and theology. Avoid thoughts outside either of those bubbles.

I don’t profess to have a corner on ideas in this area. If you have some other “accelerator” ideas, drop me a note. I’ll make sure you are properly accredited.