Open Letter to Madison, Who’s 39 and “Feeling old.” Oh, please!!
Madison ??, from somewhere on this planet, tossed out this question recently on Quora.com. I couldn’t resist responding since I’ve passed her by 2x and just might have a few thoughts on the topic.
“Is 39 years old considered old? I feel like I have so much to accomplish. I want to travel and enjoy life more but feel kind of old.”
Seriously, Madison?
I’m sorry. You are not qualified to claim that moniker. You haven’t:
- stubbed your toe enough,
- screwed up enough,
- experienced enough crises/calamities,
- enjoyed enough victories.
Your “old” is just between your temples.
Old is a state of mind and 39 is just a number with no particular significance other than the one that you may be allowing our culture to load on you.
Against the average lifespan of 80 today, you haven’t reached halftime. But, that is thinking “average” which I suspect you aren’t since you are asking this type of question.
You are at an inflection point.
Our culture would say that you are expressing signs of the classic “mid-life crisis” which is largely a myth. What most people think is a mid-life crisis is more of life delivering you a check-up, a wake-up call.
That’s healthy. So let the questions come.
Ask bigger questions.
Think BIG.
Then go small!
You’re 39 and have forever to make big things happen and enjoy life while you are doing it.
But it has to start with knowing what it is you want.
What is your big life picture?
You’ve already stated you “have so much to accomplish.” What is it? How much clarity do you have about it? What’s it for? Who’s it for? What is the change you want to make? (You can thank Seth Godin for that guidance).
Find that and then go small and bring it back to today and do one thing that will move you closer to that big picture. Do that every day and you will be blown away by what can happen in your life in five years.
I’m not making this stuff up.
Gary Keller, the founder of Keller Williams Real Estate, wrote the classic book on this topic entitled – wait for it – “The One Thing.”
Now would be a good time for you to read it.
One last thing:
Think both/and, not either/or.
You want to accomplish a lot but also travel and enjoy life. Those don’t have to be mutually exclusive. You can do both.
One more last thing:
Get healthy, stay healthy. Become a student of your biology, of how your mind and body work, and give both what they need to operate optimally. Poor health dashes more big-picture dreams than anything else.
Thanks for the question. Go big. Go small. But GO!
Outstanding advice Gary. Recently, I landed a new gig as an online trainer and noticed that my colleagues are half my age or younger and I feel odd saying I am the “wisest” in the group because of my extensive education experience. It is a new experience on my journey to be surrounded by gens x and y who are disconnected from the issues of my time like living through 1970s sky-high inflation and war. I hope my wisdom will be of value to my millennial colleagues and keep me employed in my new virtual gig with a Fortune 500 company.
Age really is a mind game isn’t it Gary? I think if I read between the lines of Madison’s question it seems that she is finding time is passing by fast and making her aware she’s not accomplishing what she really wants to do in life. This is really not a question of getting old. I agree with you in that it’s a matter of knowing and prioritizing what is really important. I think age is just a marker designed to remind us that life is not endless and to use our time wisely.