How does one work a 40 hour a week job, have time to cook healthy meals, sleep 8 hours a night, and go to the gym?

Maybe you’ve got this all figured out.

I don’t.

I know – we’re just supposed to get better at “time management.”

But then, we can’t “manage time.” Time is fixed, immutable, and unchanging. It manages itself and we can’t change what exists for us to function within. We can’t change that a minute is a minute and a day is a day.

We can only manage ourselves.

What we tag as “poor time management” is simply “poor self-management.”

I can sense your pain because you are baffled – as we all are – by “where does all my time go? How can I end up killing so much time?”

I’m a pretty organized guy that doesn’t finish a day without saying to myself: “Where the hell did my day go and why didn’t I get done what I wanted to get done?”

Have you tried doing the math on your day or week? I do it all the time trying to get better at not “killing” so much time.

Eight decades and I’m still frustrated with my progress!!

Let’s do a hypothetical and try to break down the question.  I’ll give you the benefit of the doubt on some of this.

• 168 hours (the week we all start with)
• Less 40 hours of work
• Less 5 hours commute (five days, 30 minutes one way)
• Less 56 hours of sleep
• Less 14 hours to fix and eat healthy meals
• Less 8 hours at the gym
• Balance: 40 hours

24% of the week untagged.

Isn’t it freaky how we can’t account for a quarter of our week? Or that it slips through our fingers so easily?

The gold for a fulfilling, happy, purposeful life lies in our 24%.

People who demonstrate productive self-management seem to have a handful of common sense things they have put in place:

1. A well-defined direction and sense of purpose in their lives. They have clear, challenging, and motivating goals, know where they are going, and have a limited number of lanes they are staying in.
2. They stay focused on priorities by defining what is most important within those lanes. They have learned to avoid letting the urgent displace the important. (You might find Stephen Covey’s classic book “The Seven Habits of Highly Effective People” helpful).
3. They are very good at saying “no.” This appears to be one of the most important things to consider to put solid self-management in place. Self-management experts will tell you that saying “yes” is a major killer of getting your time use under control. Whether you say “yes” or “no” will be driven by the clarity of, and commitment to, your goals and purpose.
4. They have 5 or 10-year plans that are written but flexible. They work backward from those to develop written quarterly, monthly, weekly, and daily activity lists.

You can see that the principles of good “self-management” aren’t rocket science. But that’s not to say they are easy. Life just gets in the way. Being able to roll with the unexpected that sucks up so much of that 24% and getting back on track takes discipline. And, without question, discipline is central to good self-management.

Two books to consider.

When I feel myself skidding off the rails on my efficiency, I’ll drag out one of two books that are reminders that this doesn’t need to be the problem that I allow it to become.

• “Atomic Habits: An Easy and Proven Way to Build Good Habits & Break Bad Ones” by James Clear (paid link)
• “Deep Work: Rules for Focused Success in a Distracted World” by Cal Newport (paid link)

Time is our most valuable resource. Once spent it is irretrievable. Treat it with respect and it will reward you in kind.

What works best for you to get your time under control? Love to hear your thoughts. Leave a comment or drop me an email at gary@makeagingwork.com