Are You Fearful of Old Age? What Age is “Old” to You?

I don’t believe in “time travel” so I don’t travel to the future where fear is the main resident. I certainly have the option to sit here, at 79, and be fearful of my aging but to what purpose? It’s an easy trip to take, especially when your body reminds you daily that the feet and back won’t allow you back on the basketball court or your knees prohibit a 5K or 10K run.

I’m old by current cultural standards. Heck, if I were beholden to living the average male American lifespan (78.54 years, according to World Bank), you would have missed my funeral, which is OK because most people will anyhow if the weather is bad.

Early checkout is not on my radar.


I look, act, and feel younger than what I think most people call “old.” It’s not an accident.  Since my 40s, I’ve felt that it wouldn’t be difficult to avoid being considered old before it actually happens, whenever that may be. I’ve worked to be increasingly aware of the lifestyle choices that slow the aging process and more diligent in putting them into action in my own life.

Those center around the acronym D-A-R-E, which I learned years ago from reading “Dare to Be 100” by Dr. Walter Bortz, a transformational book for me.

  • D = diet
  • A = attitude
  • R = renewal/rejuvenation (for me, this is continuous, daily learning).
  • E = exercise

It’s a pretty simple equation but not one to be considered easy, especially the “A” part. It’s the toughest because the other three don’t get enacted unless the “A” is in place and working.

As Dr. Bortz says:

“D-R-E are biological compass points for aiming for 100, but A – attitude – is most important. Within attitude lie all the planning and decision-making that facilitate the biological steps. It is possible to reach 100 by chance, but it’s not likely.”

He also reminds us that chance favors the prepared person.


In my opinion, early old is largely a choice. We’re pretty good, especially in highly-developed (and supposedly more educated and aware) western cultures, at devising ways to bring “old” on ourselves ahead of schedule.

On average we die at an age that is only 2/3 of our current benchmarked full-life biological potential (Google up Jeanne Calment of Paris). Most of that is due to the lifestyle choices we make early in life and carry into mid-life where they manifest into an accelerated downward slope of aging unless compensated for.


What age is “old” to me? I guess I personally would probably have to start giving in to some “oldness” around 95–100. I haven’t, however, programmed that into the 25-year plan that I try to keep rolling in front of me.

Here’s the “die young as late as possible” model for aging I subscribe to that I borrowed from the late executive coach, Ms. Helen Harkness, and that I featured in one of my blog articles.

  • Young adulthood: 20-40
  • First midlife: 40-60
  • Second midlife: 60-80
  • Young old: 80-90
  • Elderly: 90 and above
  • Old-old: 2-3 years to live

At 79, I like the sound and feel of still being in my second mid-life. It feels right since I’m finding a surprising reserve in the old gas tank (knees and feet notwithstanding).

I also like the brevity of the “old-old and 2-3 years to live” except that I favor 2-3 minutes instead of years.

I still envision going face down in a trout stream having just fooled a 20″ rainbow.

At somewhere around 110.


What is “old” to you? Share your view with a comment below.

8 replies
  1. John Clark says:

    Geez, Gary! What are you worried about? Who cares what people call you? The only thing that is important is how you feel about yourself.

    Reply
  2. Gordon E. Hartwig says:

    You are only as old as you think you are. I am 77 but still play basketball, hike 4 or 5 miles with elevation gain of 1200+ feet, lift weights and get in 20+ miles of fast walking and some running. I don’t think of myself as old and love all sorts of activities….I used to play soccer at 75 but have had hamstring problems so I had to give it up. I am looking forward to future races which I racewalk. You have to get out every day and be active. Just remember “Don’t let the old man in”

    Reply
  3. John Panter says:

    Good Job Gordon! you are my hero. I agree Gary. Not much to add here. I think attitude is the key here. I think all things that you listed rely on attitude, or as they say today “mindset.” It is like a ripple effect. Attitude is the pebble that drops into the pool. The ripples are eating correctly, exercising and learning. Thank you for the post!

    Reply
  4. Reza says:

    Thanks for the article, Gary.

    I am 62. I felt old as soon as I hit 60. It was almost instantaneous. It was mental more than physical.

    I have always been harmful to my body and health. Very poor lifestyle choices that, unfortunately, continue even now. Mental issues, I guess.

    I have minor health issues, but thankfully nothing major yet.

    I’d like to think that I am going to be good to my body and my “self” from now on. The chances are that I am going to have health problems in the near future due to my lifestyle choices. If so, I will have to accept them and deal with them as best as I’m able.

    But, my hope is that if I sustain taking care of myself, I will somehow mitigate the damage I have done so far.

    Thanks again for your positive contributions with your articles.

    Reply
  5. Teresa Yates says:

    I don’t give a whit about living until I’m 100 – 110 to become a doddering old fool. If I can live a healthy and intellectually vibrant life until age 110 that would be fantastic. But the reality is most people who reach 100 are dependent on others, mentally, physically or financially. That is not what I want for myself or for those who might feel responsible for me. I want to live my best, full life until it isn’t a good life anymore due to dementia, illness or lack of money. And if I happen to keep my memory, my health and be able to pay my own bills until I’m 100, then Yay! But striving to keep alive just to make it to 100 is not a worthy goal for me. I’ll pass (pardon the pun!)

    Reply
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  7. Murray says:

    We were doing well until my wife suffered a stroke and related brain damage at age 83. 3 months of steady decline and it was over.we both had been steadily active until that time. I have had a few operations for cancer growths, but a few days and continue as usual. Stll planning hikes to one of the original settlements in this part of the world, including natives. french, and people from new England after some of the wars there. (five miles up over a mountain, but a beautiful walk, lakes and forests. old graveyards.good for a day at least.

    Reply

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